Lost !

Losing is a feeling which any living being doesn't like to experience. It makes them weak at heart, depressed, their confidence to plummet down, lose interest in any activity be it eating, sleeping or any other. I have noticed animals when lost in a fight with other animals for territory control, mating, survival etc. exhibit the above feelings, but they get over it quickly & soon gets back to its business. But in the case of humans its different, because we are so complex than animals, the feeling of losing has a much stronger effect on us. It plays a greater role in building an individual's personality. Losing makes some individuals strong, some immune to it, some to fear it & in extreme cases some to give up their life. It is how we deal with losing that determines our attitude. I believe a deeper understanding of this feeling called 'LOSING' helps one to cope with it better. I lost in a cycle race, I lost in quiz, I lost in clearing an exam with desired marks, I lost in pataising a girl etc. If i carefully analyze as to WHY & HOW I lost? rather than succumbing to after-effects of losing i.e getting depressed about it, helps me to learn my mistake which led to me losing. Some wise men say 'Life is lesson', I believe 'losing' would be a unit in it. Losing exposes our weakness, mistakes, limitations which if analyzed properly & learned carefully would not lead to 'losing' again. I came across this good qoute which is inspiring "Losing and learning to go on and live again is the only kind of winning that truly matters".
        Hence I feel losing is'nt a bad feeling its just that how we percieve it is what matters the most. Getting scared of losing means losing more. If one can manage to get over th after-effects of losing like embarassment, shame, loss of respect in front of our people, Then one can win. The main reason some people fear losing is because of the people around them. 'People respect winners, look down on losers'. This is in their nature & no one can change this. If we adopt the ' I dont give a f**k about what people think about me, I do what I feel is right for me' attitude then we need not fear to lose & losing will have least impact on us. But we have to make sure what we do right is really right & not wrong :) & if it turns out what we are doing is indeed wrong & leads to losing, we can always backtrack & do what is right.
        I came across this nice song of coldplay which  inspires me a lot when I've lost.
     
           

A long Order...

   The semester was coming to an end & D was very sad about it, He knew after this semester there would be some major changes in his life, No more daily hangouts at the college, cracking jokes in the class, playing pranks on his friends in the computer lab, gossiping, bunking classes, attending college fests etc. He had already begun counting his last days at the college. He had lost interest in life as each day passed by, always thinking whether he can in anyway re-live his college days. There was about a month and a half left for the final semester exams, & he realized that each day he lived from now on would be very precious. He had spent almost 5 years in the college now, 1st two years being his PU studies & the next 3 for his Bachelors. The 1st two years were totally irrelevant to him, As he had hardly explored the college life. The main focus being the 2nd PU exams & the CET. D was very shy, silent & hardly spoke to anyone. He had very few best friends. His parents dreamed of him studying engineering, so that they could proudly say when asked.. 'What is you son doing? or 'What has you son studied?' & the proud reply would be - 'Engineering/Engineer'. It dint matter in what field he would specialize at Mechanical, Civil, software.. etc. Just the word 'Engineer' was what they would be content with. Can't blame them as the word itself had a high place in the society, & whoever was an engineer or doing engineering would attract respect. And so he spent his two years preparing for the two exams that would make his parents dream come true. He was quite good at studies but very lazy which often was the cause for his bad performance. Two years went by & it was the day of the results, His 2nd PU final exam percentage was in mid-seventies & his CET ranking was 19K, Both average scores but not enough to get him an engineering seat in one of the good colleges. His parents were very sad, his father couldnt believe his son had shattered his dreams. Things were very gloom at D's home, with his parents now uncertain about D's future. D was good at computers, he did his 1st computer course when he was just 10yrs old. & the trainer had told his parents that D would do well in the IT field. D's ambition was to become a software engineer. And so he finally decided after much consultation from friends & relatives that he would do BCA, at that time not many people were aware of this degree & would mistake it for BSc. 
               He joined the same college & much to his luck, the hod for BCA stayed in the same street where he lived. So it made him quite comfortable as he knew the hod well. And so with new hope of repairing his career which had taken a beating recently and with a new dream of joining one of the IT giants, he started his 3 year journey. He was shy, silent initially, but was quite determined in his approach to studies & so ended up being a topper in the 1st year. He continued with the same determination and found some very good friends along the way, He was conistently doing well in studies & had ventured out into other activities like participating in college fests, orgainizing events in the college, getting involved in important discussion in the class etc. He was enjoying every moment of his college life now & hoped it would never end. He had become very attached to the college with his friends, teachers. He also got placed in one of the IT companies in his final year, his dream had come true & so for his parents as well. He was feeling uncomfortable now & felt someone poking him continously, he heard the sound of plate being kept on the table, some taken away, people engaged in discussion, some laughing, some eating.. the sound became increasingly louder as he felt more pokes, he saw faces staring at him, faces he was very familiar with. One of them said loudly 'Lo Maga ellidyo? Yava lokadali kaldogidyo?' meaning (Dude where are you? in which world are you lost in?). D suddenly gathered his senses, he saw Farooq poking at him, his friends  Avi, Deadly, Allola, Busa, Viru, Suhas, Somari looking at him puzzled. D had lost himself amidst the thoughts of his college life. He was so engrossed in those memories that he did not notice the waiter quite upset, staring at him.. The waiter had been standing at their table waiting for D who was yet to order something from the menu catalogue which he was holding for quite a long while now since the waiter had arrived.  

OM - Overwhelming Movie

      After a loong tiring sunday class, My mind was cluttered with emotions of happiness, sadness, irritation, & heartbreak. I desperately felt the need to go out & clear my mind. And as I was thinking where to go.. my college buddy Ajay called me for a movie that evening, together we went to OM, a kannada movie re-released at a theatre nearby.
      Released in 1995, directed by superstar Upendra, Om was a MASSIVE BLOCKBUSTER kannada movie in those days, It became such a hit in kannada film industry, that the makers decided not to sell the movie through video cassettes or to any kannada channels, but decided to re-release the movie every 5 years. And guess what? the movie continues to give competition to other new movies in terms of collection & runs housefull everytime it is re-released. Here's an abstraction of the movie...

      Our hero, a good innocent, studious, intelligent, brahmin is provoked by a girl to fall in love with her,to which, like all boys do.. he agrees, then girl tells hero to fight the baddies, he does it. then girl backfires & tells she did it for revenge, keeps a fitting to police that hero killed all the baddies, police nab hero. hero is bailed out by a famous rowdy & offered a lucrative job in rowdyism with incentives, hero rejects the offer & seeks to find out why that girl backfired, to this girl tells a small flashback, in which hero is indirectly involved in sucide committed by girl's brother. Hero tells Situation made him to do that, girl disagrees & shoo's away hero, hero's family throws him out of the house.. hero becomes mad. the famous rowdy comes again with the job offer, hero takes up the offer. What follows next is hero making a big name in rowdyism & taking revenge on heroine for betraying him by beating up guys who talk with her, barging in & spoiling heroine's engagenment, burning her stylish body revealing clothes like shorts, burning her tv, car etc. boy! he destroys everything in heroine's home.. makes her cry half of the movie, Finally heroine unable to bear this torture.. falls for him. Wow! Wat a way to woo a girl!! :)  but wait.. now  hero backfires & tells heroine to avoid him. but heroine resists & tells hero to quit his job i.e stop rowdyism. But hero wont.. so heroine stops eating food. she becomes de-hydrated, gets admitted to hospital, doctor is helpless to save her. Now hero steps in & agrees to quit his job, but there's a problem.. our hero had a lot of jealous colleagues who were planning to finish him off & boy!! were they lucky to get this oppurtunity.. now all baddy colleagues attack the hospital where heroine is & fight injuring hero & burning heroine's face with acid. finally one of the big hearted baddy colleague realizes his mistake & lets hero, heroine live.. by giving him the pink slip. In the end.. our hero starts his own business by setting up a military hotel serving chitrana, idli, dosas, tea, coffee etc. & poses infront of the hotel with his heroine & two kids.. Happy ending..
          The songs, dialogues are excellent. The movie is a proof to superstar upendra's excellent directorial skills, with all those twists & turns, wats more he had roped in real-life Rowdies into the movie.. All in all a great movie, definitely worth watching..  

Happy Diwali

       Diwali 2009, tagged with IPL CLT20 'Yeh Diwali hogi cup wali', Yes diwali hogi cup wali but hamara nahi pardes ka. All indian teams failing to make it to semis, we cant blame them after all they play for money & others for their teams. This time diwali was celebrated more compared to last time, I can say this as there were a lot of crackers burst this time in our area compared to last time. I dint burst any of them though this time.. My little sisters have grown up, now they are shy to come out & burst crackers.. I used to burst crackers with them as I got not only my crackers, but even their crackers to burst.. I loved bursting bombs atom bomb, hydrogen bomb, lakshmi bomb, Koyal bombs..etc my favorite were hydrogen bombs, boy they made a hell of a sound. enough to burst my neighbour Indira Gandhi's window glass panes, & I loved breaking those windows first with my cricket shots, then with crackers. Diwali was the time to take revenge on my enemy neighbours.. they were enemies because they would'nt allow me to play cricket or any other game in front of their home, street to be exact. So me & my friends would pile up a bunch of rockets, double shots, butterfly bomb, then we would draw a plan to fire them exactly at our enemy neigbour homes, then comes the execution time. Our plans would work perfectly every year & they did not have any choice than to lock up their balcony doors & windows, they wouldnt complain because they would not know that we were behind those as our bombing loactions were strategically at different points. This happened every diwali, they were so irritated that they even complained to the police about it.. that is when we gave up our attack & retaliated. Now all my friends have gone, some engineers, some accountants & other profesions, we hardly meet & its been years since I saw some of them. And so i move on...

My First Blog

Finally, out of my utter boredom.. sitting in my office with no work from the past 1 week. I decide to start blogging.. Well wat do I blog about?? I shall start exploring that while I post my second blog soon.